Scars fade
by Reibunriinta
Summary: ((Paralai one-shot)) Baralai sees scars from Paine's pre Crimson Squad days and asks about them and he discovers just how traumatizing her childhood really was. And he promises to love her forever. PainexBaralai


Baralai loved Paine, he loved her snarky comments and her strong attitude...people knew not to mess with her and heaven help anyone who tried to hurt her friends. He loved this about her, but he always thought that she'd always been that way. He didn't have any clue about her life in the past...he had no clue about anything until that night.

...

Two years had passed since they'd defeated vegnagun, and him and Paine were newly married. Everything was perfect and yet Paine was still a bit distant. But he wasn't worried about it, she would open up over time. He wasn't too worried about her, she had nerves of steel, nothing could shake her...or so he thought.

"And how was New Yevon today?" Paine asked making small talk as they entered their bedroom one night. Paine making small talk; one of the many perks of being married to her.

"Eh..." He groaned "I can't wait till' they replace me..."

Paine snorted "You're kidding, if you want out you'll have to resign. They'll want to keep you on for the rest of your life. Heck if they could get away with it they'd keep you as an unsent like they did the Maesters."

Baralai frowned "I guess you're right...I'll resign as soon as I find a good replacement." He mumbled.

Paine nodded as she walked over to her dresser and pulled out a pair of violet pajamas that Yuna had got her from her birthday Last year. When she was changing her shirt Baralai noticed a scar that ran across her stomach and curved all the way up to her side.

"What's this?" He asked gently touching her side. She flinched and stiffened up.

"It's nothing!" She exclaimed a bit too quickly, as tears filled her eyes.

"baby, you're crying? Is that scar from our Crimson squad days?" Baralai said with a worried edge to his voice.

Paine shook her head. Then she finished changing into her pajamas as she composed herself.

"Lai...I...I" Paine was stuttering...Paine never stuttered! Something was wrong, something he didn't know about.

Paine suddenly started shaking as more tears fell from her face, her knees buckled and she fell to the floor.

"Paine!" Baralai exclaimed, he'd never seen him like this and it scared him. He scooped her up and carried her to bed, she looked up at him with tear filled eyes. Tears filled Baralai's eyes when he saw she was smiling.

" I love you." She whispered, with a smile. "I'm glad your here to see me cry...You know..." She paused "You're a lot stronger than you think." She whispered "I just fake it."

Baralai sighed as he set her on the bed and drew the blanket over her. "You scared me..." He whispered as he climbed up into bed next to her and wrapped his arm around her cuddling into her. "I thought you were going die just now..." He whispered realizing too late how ridiculous that sounded.

Paine laughed gently. "It won't be that easy to get rid of me!" She joked making them both laugh.

After a few minutes of silence Baralai had to ask, "What was that scar from?" He asked gently, almost afraid she would start shaking again. But she didn't, she stated calm.

"The orphanage in Bevelle." She whispered closing her eyes only to snap them open with a Pained expression on her face.

"The orphanage?" Baralai asked wonderingly "What happened there?"

Baralai and Paine had grown up in the same orphanage. He had known this all along, and yet he'd never noticed her back then, so he knew nothing of her life there. He knew from their Crimson Squad that she'd run away from the orphanage to join the Crimson Squad but he'd never asked why.

"They abused me Lai." Paine said sadly. "That scar was one of many...and I had more bruises than I bothered to count." Her every word seemed pained as she whispered it, she was fighting not to relive her past.

"But why? And who exactly?" Baralai asked in an upset tone. He shouldn't have pressed her...but he felt he had to know what happened.

"Everyone..." Paine whispered, cringing. "The adults...the kids...they all hated me. I was the black sheep, the one they blamed for everything. I never said anything about it, I just took it and tried to avoid everyone...they never stopped. No matter what I did they wouldn't stop...when I was little I used to try and win their mercy...it never worked. I would do anything if I thought that they'd be proud of me for it. Eventually I realized it wouldn't work...so I just tried to avoid everybody and just accept the fact I was worthless. A few months before we went to join the Crimson Squad I tried to run away, I made it all the way to the Bevelle temple before they caught up with me. They...they pushed me to hard and I fell off one of the lifts and impaled myself of a machina. I woke up a month later and the abuse just got worse...when I ran away to join the Crimson squad I wasn't just trying to escape. I thought I was...but really...if I helped bring down Sin then they'd have to like me...or so I thought...I thought I was being strong, really I was no different than my younger self trying to win love from monsters. When I was made a recorder...when they said I was too week to fight, I thought I was a failure. And well...you know the rest..." She spoke slowly and painfully, crying occasionally and unsuccessfully trying to stop herself from reliving her memories.

Baralai was furious! How could they do such a thing to someone as beautiful and one of a kind as Paine? But mostly, he was furious at himself! _He was there the whole freaking time! How is it he never noticed this! He should have been there for her! He was right there...why in heck didn't he do something, or stand up for her, or even realize she was there? Why wasn't he there for her when she needed someone the most?! _

As if she could read his thoughts she whispered "You're here now." She smiled and cuddled into him with a yawn. "that is all ancient history... I know I have friends now.. I've got all the others looking out for me. And I've got you...you complete me Baralai. You filled the part of me that was empty...I know you love me. And I love you too, so stop beating yourself up and go to sleep." Her words were scarcely a mumble now but they still penetrated Baralai's heart and caused tears to well up in his eyes.

He placed a kiss on her cheek and whispered goodnight as she fell asleep in his arms. He would make up for the lost years now...he would stay with her always and prove to her just how unique and wonderful she really was...and when all was said and done he would be there for her. This was their story...and together they'd make it the best story ever.

_**A/N Hiya guys! This is my first Paralai fic so don't be too harsh on me/I hope you like it. I am a HUGE Paralai fan so you can expect a ton more of these! Anyway please comment and tell me what you think. **__** Bya guys! **__** ^_~! See y'all later! ^_~**_


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